New Zealand

New Zealand is bloody expensive!!!  The average price of a meal out is $20 and a t-shirt $50.  If you are planning on visiting NZ be prepared to shell out some dough!

Driving on the left side of the road is a little challenging.  For the first few days, I played a few games of chicken before realizing that I was still in North American driving mode.  Thankfully there isn’t many cars on the road here.  Actually most of the traffic on the roads are camper vans and other tourists learning the rules of the road as well.

Other than the price of things here NZ is a little strange.  Once you get past the fact that the entire North Island and a good portion of the South Island have been totally clear cut from all it’s timber, it’s beauty starts to come through.  However it does look like a large scale diorama.  Instead of replanting native trees, they brought in pine trees because they have shorter growth cycles, and planted them in perfect little rows. Where they didn’t replant has become pastures for the numerous cows and sheep.  So most of NZ looks like a fifties move set.  Too perfect and not enough ruggedness.   The South Island is were most of the parks are and still have maintained it’s natural beauty.

One thing I have really learned about myself is how much I love the ocean!  I know that wherever I live it will have to be near it.  Preferably an island.  I went sailing for the first time and LOVED IT!!  For some reason I didn’t  think I would.  My God, the freedom of being on open water is phenomenal!!

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My initial goal for NZ was to volunteer for accommodation and food.  However, a woman I met in Hawaii, Carolyn, emailed me saying she was coming to NZ and wanted to know if I wanted to travel with her.  She is quite lovely and the two of us get along really well.  She is a photographer doing a project on areas effected by climate change.  Her project is called the Witness Tree. 

It’s been wonderful traveling with someone.  Again, I’m finding that I’m never really alone and always meeting people to hang out with.  The one down side to this is I haven’t been meditating and taking time out for personal space.  I’m really noticing the affects of this.  I’m feeling good for the most part.  Integrating the constant flow of change is a little challenging.

I’m able to stay present and aware and magical things happening have resulted from this.  However my energy level is a little low.  Not so much physically, although I do find that I’m pretty wiped out at the end of each day.  I feel that in some ways I’m either holding myself back from fully engaging in the world around me or just so busy integrating all that is happening that anything else is just too much.  I’m having a good time, and loving seeing the sights but there still feels like something is missing. Yet I know nothing is missing at all. 

I’m still discovering who I am and what I’m about.  Constantly pushing beyond comfortable boundaries and pushing myself in ways that I never needed to before.  Yet, I feel more and more comfortable traveling.  Even India doesn’t seem as frightening because I know I’ll end up travelling with someone or a group of people.  And even if I don’t I feel I can handle the pressures that traveling brings.

Letting go of being in constant contact with home is also getting easier.  I thought it would be easy to connect with people more frequently.  I’m realizing what a privileged system we have in North America for communications.  NZ gets their internet from Australia from and underwater cable.  The cable is to small and limits the bandwidth and the amount of data one can use.  So internet here is very, very expensive. No free café’s anywhere.  Hostels charge $10 a day or $4 for half and hour. 

  

Even if I had regular internet access, I know that I still wouldn’t be online often.  The whole idea behind traveling is to get out there!  To meet new people and move forward in life.  Not that I’m leaving my friends permanently, but, with moving on, contact between friends and family becomes less and less.  I’m still here for everyone and I know people back home are still there for me.  My heart is full of their love and therefore I and they haven’t really gone anywhere.  It makes it hard to be present and learn new things though when I’m constantly thinking of staying in contact.   I will also say that I’ve been terrible at sending post cards.  I buy them then get busy then tired to send them…  I am thinking of all you though!

Once again I’m grateful for this blog so I can share my experiences with everyone.  So I apologize for not staying in contact more personally with some of you. 

My Godmother asked me if traveling was what I hoped it would be.  It’s a great question.  The answer to that is yes and no.  Traveling in the way that I am, is both stressful and relaxing.  It’s lonely and connective.  It’s not as romantic as I thought it would be.  It’s exhilarating, engrossing and exciting, and yet keeping up with all the information and experiences leaves me often overwhelmed and tired.  Integrating everything takes it toll on me and yet I don’t want it to stop.  I haven’t been journaling or taking notes as much as I would like because it feels like its way to much.  However, I’m already forgetting some of the places I’ve been to because there is just sooooo much to take in.  I’m learning though as I go and doing my best to incorporate some practices that will be of benefit (like taking notes). 

I now have a system for packing!!!  YEAY!!  Even with all the info that people gave me for packing, it really is a personal journey.  One thing that I will pass on is buy dry bags and different sized ones.  They are great for compressing clothing and will keep them dry in very humid climates.  Plus you can use them for day bags at the beach.  Thumbs up to Carolyn for getting me on to them!

Anyway today is a beautiful day and I must get outside!  My love to you all.  Photos of NZ will be posted soon!

Settling In

I’m settling in to life on the road and traveling is getting easier.  I’m getting use to moving around, not staying one place for a long time and meeting numerous people from all over the world.  Actually mainly Germans. 

Fijiwas a culture shock.  I’m glad I started there because even though there was much poverty, Fijians will give you the clothes off their backs if you are getting a little too sunburned.  They are the most selfless people I’ve met thus far and very, very beautiful esthetically as well.

After I left my initial accommodations and found a couch to surf on, I felt much better about being in Fiji.  Staying with Diane was wonderful.  I became much more relaxed and felt safer being in the company of other people.  Meeting some of the locals gave me a better perspective on Fijian life.  Diane rented the basement of her home out to two twin brothers, Phillip and Tofu. They were from one of the low land nation islands but I can’t think of the name of it right not.  They were fire dances and craftsmen.  Both worked in the backpacker resorts entertaining and providing activities for guests.  Incredibly sweet talented men.  I hung out with them when I was staying at Diane’s and I went to Mana Island in the Yasawa’s with Phillip for a couple of days.  He was working at the backpackers I stayed at.  Again it was nice to have someone with me who knew the ways of the land and culture.

I didn’t make it to far inland in Fiji.  I here that the mountains and rivers are something to see.  Instead I headed out to the YasawaIslands for a couple of days.  The group of Islands are stunning and extremely warm.  It was so warm that even the ocean felt soupy.  Mana Island is a village island.  The village was behind the backpackers place.  I felt incredibly guilty for being there.  These people have next to nothing and live very simply.  Here I was taking one of the best buildings to sleep in and eating food that most couldn’t afford.  Yet most of them seemed to be very happy.  I didn’t get over the guilt, but each day I felt extremely grateful for the opportunities and things that I have.  I will say that it was fun to play with the local kids.  They hung out with me and a woman I met who was from the States.

Fiji was beautiful and an eye opener.  I feel a little bit more prepared for places like Thailand and India.

Traveling and Internet

Internet isn't as easily accessible as I thought it would be.  Particularly in New Zealand.  If your in a cafe you get one hour free then it is anywhere from $1 to $4  for 15 minutes.  So, unfortunately I'm not online as often as I though.  Which is probably a good thing.  Any I will post more than photos soon.  Finding time to charge batteries in full hostels isn't easy at times either.

Anyway I'll have more for you soon!

Fiji

Photo's from Fiji!!  Will right about it soon.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/visionlesswitness/sets/72157629059947818/

Challenges

One week in to my trip and I’m feeling transformed already.  Although I was in Hawaii, it was a tough start.  It’s hard to put into words the process I am still going though.  It’s amazing how resistant I am to severe change.  All I wanted to do when I got to Hawaii was go home.  Even after meeting Ellen and exploring the absolute beauty of the Big Island of Hawaii, I would still wake up in the mornings wanting to be back in Canada.  Actually I wanted someone to be with me to help take the edge off.  It’s the first time in a long time that I felt incredibly lonely.

These feelings gradually started to go away as I keep physically busy.  I also let the energy of the Island peel away my resistance and let it support me.  What I found funny was that when I got to Cortes, most people felt peace and joy and I was dismantled and eventually came to peace.  When I got to Hawaii, I felt Pele welcome and hold me where as others were being dismantled.  Even though I felt welcomed there, Hawaii challenged me physically.  Ellen a wonderful Canadian/America woman I met at the hostel, was a climber and very physically fit.  Within a day of being with her I knew that I entered some kind of boot camp to get into shape.

Some of the hikes we did were very physically demanding.  I knew that I was being tested physically and that it was important that I push myself as hard as I could.  Thankfully, not only was Ellen physical fit, she was incredibly supportive and encouraging.  I knew that I needed to get in better shape if I am to travel the world.  I needed to learn to contain and control the energy that is going through my body and not fear it.  When I get scared I don't want to move and it creates many problems for me physically, mentally and emotionally.  As I hiked, swam and kayaked, I had to really focus on my breathing, allowing all my experience to be fully integrated and not to dissociate from the feelings I was having. 

It wasn’t just the physical activity that helped me move through my fears. The Big Island of Hawaii is a magnificent island geologically in the fact that it is still being born.  The active volcanoes are creating new land almost daily.  What is interesting is that even though eruptions have devastated the land, it is creating land at the same time.  Much of the ground is volcanic rock and ash and you can feel the life force shifting under your feet.  But, then as you look around you start to see life.  Green life, emerging out of black, baked hardening rock.  It’s absolutely phenomenal to see the birth of the earth, creation itself at work.  After watching the news and seeing the destruction that man is doing to our Mother Gaia, to come to Hawaii and see and feel the living, breathing force of the planet we live on gave me a renewed sense of hope.  This planet IS ALIVE and you can witness it breathing on Hawaii. 

The Creative spark of primal life, giving birth to Earth and seeing it’s painful yet beautiful process made me realize that human’s too are constantly going through the same cycles.  We are always growing, expanding, shedding and renewing ourselves.  We are always dying in some form and being reborn again. Not just psychologically, but biologically as well.  We follow the same process as earth and even though it’s painful and destructive at times, it is also very beautiful and magical.  Being in Hawaii helped me to understand and integrate my own growth.

I’m extremely grateful for this island and Ellen for helping me to push beyond all my boundaries and see that even though I am in a constant flux of change, a solid foundation for the future is emerging.

I can feel a difference within myself already.  I arrived in Fiji late last night and discovered that my hostel wasn't a hostel and that it was really quite remote. There was a price discrepancy for the rate, and they said I needed to pay for WIFI.  Plus there are only two other guest here so it makes it hard to meet other travelers. Oh and I realized that the converter I bought for my laptop doesn't work.

I could feel the familiar feelings of wanting to come home arise. I also felt incredibly lonely.  Breathe.  I just dealt with things as they came up.  Even though Fijians speak English it isn't very good.  I had moments this morning of wanting to go home, however, as the day wears on it is dissipating.  One of the messages I got while on Cortes is to stay grounded and stay connected.  I'm doing just that.  The staff here are very friendly and helpful.  One even gave me a converter to use.  After talking to Ali, I felt better about being here.

It's amazing how I can change my state of mind just by changing the way I think and also by being gentle with myself.  I'm still not sure about traveling.  It's not as romantic as I hoped it would be.  It is a challenge and I'm grateful that I've always been able to meet them head on.

Photos from Hawaii

Click on my the link to Flickr on the left hand side for new photos!

Much Better

So after I wrote that last post I got up and went into the kitchen feeling like I was gonna pack it in and head back to Cortes. However,  I got talking to one of the girls I met last night and as it turned out she rented a car.  Things started to look up.  She then said she was going to go kayaking and snorkeling. I asked to tag along.

OH MY GOD WHAT A DAY!!  We went to the Captain Cook Monument that isn't far from the hostel.  When we got there a couple of local guys asked us if we needed help to get the kayak in the water.  For $5.  You had to drop the kayak into the water from a wharf that was about 3 feet high then jump in.  Yikes.  We attempted it on our own. After successfully getting in without tipping it, we paddled out into the ocean.

This was my first time actually kayaking and swimming in an ocean!!  (Actually the first time I was in the ocean was on Cortes but it was a very quick dip as the Pacific in the north was only 10 degrees.)  As we paddled out we had a school of spinner dolphins come up to the boat.  I started to cry.  They were so beautiful and playful.  We followed them for about 45 minutes.  The day just got better and better from there.  Swimming with the fish and manta rays, watching humped back whales jump and dance in the water.  Then beer and pizza on a patio at sunset.  It was a totally magical, beautiful transforming day.  It was the perfect day to begin a new life.  I started to let go of the fear of uncertainty and decided that not knowing what the day will bring can be pretty fun.

Ok...traveling isn't so bad after all.  I still can't believe I'm in Hawaii. I still need to open up and learn to not be so fearful.  It will come with time.

One thing I was aware of today is how bloody cautious I've become.  I was usually the first person to jump in to do something adventurous.  Now I'm the one saying "I don't know..we may get in trouble, or we shouldn't be doing this or whatever....And nothing that would really land me in any legal or physical trouble. Nor anything that is really irresponsible either.  Somewhere along the way I feel I've lost the spontaneous adventurous edge I loved.  I'm not sure what happened.  If this is what it means to get older than I don't want a part of it.

Photos of the day on Flicker.  Unfortunately I didn't have a waterproof camera and didn't get any fish, dolphin or whale shots.  :-(